Almost but not yet...

Faith is trust in the Lord, Though my eyes cannot see.
Put my trust in the Cross, Know my life is in Him...  

I stil remember in the beginning of the year, when I first started to plan my career to be a Team Leader, everything felt so far away and remote. No matter how many times I was told, "There will be opportunities and you definitely have the potential....blahblahblah" It just seemed like something "Good to try, but not a must" to me.

Not until when Angel got pregnant, and that I had to play the Deputy role, I then got a little taste of what a Team Leader does - hm yea, not bad.

June - mid year, however, this was exactly what I wrote in my journal :

"After all these summit, Business plans, meetings with managers, trainings... I started to doubt whether I still like all these work. It's a bit tiring. But coming to a point - Ven, are you doing this all for yourself? And why would I want to be one?
-> Motivate people,
help develop a person's career
look into people's need, strength, weakness
able to accept that, and speak with love.
*IT'S ALL ABOUT LOVE* "

So I held on, and unto what I believe. I told you I didn't have the passion, You gave me the passion; I told you I didn't have the intelligence, You shed light in every single decision that I made; I told You I didn't know where to go, You guided me in every single step that I took...

And now we finally get there, almost. Fear has overwhelmed me that I have lost the confidence to walk on.  Caring too much about what people think has always hindered me from doing the right thing. And Angel use to be my go-to person, my confirmation. Now the fact that she's leaving forces me to be on my own. Do I have what it takes? I honestly don't know. But Lord, could you be THE MENTOR that I need, and bring me beyond?